History's Oddities: Horny Historical Facts (19 GIFS)

23 Nov 2023

"Crocodile dung was used as a contraceptive in ancient Egypt. Women would literally use croc feces for its acidity in order to prevent pregnancy."

"Ernest Hemingway was the ultimate bro. After hearing that F. Scott Fitzgerald was feeling less than confident about his manhood, Hemingway met him in the men’s room and took a good look at his penis, reassuring him that it was perfect."

"Antonie van Leeuwenhoek is credited with discovering sperm. The Dutch biologist would literally just stare at his own semen under a microscope. What a life."

"During the Charleston Harbor Blockade, Blackbeard decided to forgo gold, and instead asked for mercury. At the time, mercury was thought to cure gonorrhea when injected into the urethra, and his crew was riddled with it."

"Sixth U.S. President, John Quincy Adams not only claimed, but bragged that America actually invented having sex outdoors."

"“When I die, bury me with a heaping boner.” That was probably along the lines of what King Tut stated before he was mummified. Egyptologists have stated that being buried with an erection supposedly evoked the powers Osiris, Lord of the Underworld."

"Lawrence Burst Sperry is credited with inventing what we now know as ‘autopilot.’ If you have any doubts, in 1916 he and passenger, Cynthia Polk invented another term that we still use…the Mile High Club. Both parties were married to other people, and karma kicked in as Sperry’s autopilot turned off leading to a crash-landing."

"Julie D’Aubigny was an opera-singing bisexual, and she was as horny as they come. It’s been said that she ran away and joined a convent so that she could sleep with some of the nuns. Julie would also challenge men to duels. After winning, she would have sex with their wives."

"Mozart was a total freak. One of his compositions is titled, Leck mich im Arsch which simply translates to “Lick me in the ass.”"

"Benjamin Franklin loved being in the nude. So much so, that he would literally stand in front of his open windows in nothing but his 1706 birthday suit."

"Author of Frankenstein, Mary Shelley may have been the big-tiddied goth girl of every man’s dream. She went as far as losing her virginity on top of her mother’s gravestone."

"One of King Charles’ mistresses was an actress named Nell Gwyn. She became so enthralled with Charles that she did just about anything to get rid of his other mistresses. That included lacing the cake of one of her rivals with laxatives."

"The real reason Coca-Cola exists is because inventor, John Stith Pemberton was trying to get over his morphine addiction. Hence the infamous original ingredient…cocaine."

"Catherine the Great was known to be a lady in the street, but a freak in the bed. There were even certain people who were her designated foot-ticklers."

"Victor Hugo loved himself a good Parisian brothel. After hearing the news of Hugo’s death, all of the local clubs in Paris closed down so that the workers could attend his funeral."

"Kaiser Wilhelm II was obsessed with his own mother. Infatuated would be a complete understatement. The German Emperor would even write down all of the sexual fantasies and dreams he was having as a teen, and send the letters to his mom."

"The Isle of Tortuga apparently was just as bad as the Pirates of the Caribbean movies made it out to be. In the 1600s, France was so worried about homosexuality amongst pirates that they shipped prostitutes to Tortuga for free."

"The modern trope of witches riding brooms actually has a seedy and sexual history. In the middle ages, European women discovered that taking hallucinogens vaginally, rather than orally, was much more effective. They began rubbing ointment onto broomsticks and… hopped on."

"Novelist James Joyce was WAY into butt stuff. Specifically lady farts. James infamously wrote letters to his wife Nora about her filthy farts. One passage reads as follows, “At every fuck I gave you your shameless tongue come bursting out through your lips and if I gave you a bigger stronger fuck than usual fat dirty farts came spluttering out of your backside.”"

1 Comment ?