Not Now, Notification! Not Now! (17 GIFS)

5 Aug 2020

"I was ordering food off of doordash on my exes phone when she got a text from guy saying he couldn’t wait to see her that weekend. She told me she was going to see her mom."

greekfire01

"While my friend was using my phone, my mom texted me “Remember not to have sex with Thomas, he has chlamydia.”"

EmotionalSmell2260

"This happened to my friend, I sent him a text of a wet cat and said look at this wet Pussy, while my other friends mom was holding his phone. She just awkwardly gave him his phone back."

wanker696

"Years ago I was working at an Apple store as a Genius (technician) and was helping an older woman with her phone. This woman had to be in her late 60s early 70s, as sweet as could be, and was having some minor issues with her phone, I think it was battery life or something.

So she hands me her phone, and just as she does a message pops up with a picture of a toilet full of shit and the message reads “how many times do I have to tell you to flush the fucking toilet?!”

Not knowing really what to do I just hand it back to her and tell her she has a message. She takes the phone, half smiles, closes the message and hands it back saying, “sorry about that sweetheart, my daughter can be a bit of a bitch.”"

slaimt

"Showing my aunt a pic when a text saying “I’d fuck the shit out of machine gun Kelly”’appeared. We both pretended we didn’t see it and quickly started talking about something else."

buddhablossoms

"I was the one doing the sending. I moved to Japan a couple of years ago and early one morning I was at a market and saw a tanuki statue that had the full cock’n’balls on display. I took a picture of it and thought it would be funny to send my brother a message reading “UNSOLICITED DICK PIC!” then send a pic of the tanuki statue.

Little did I know, halfway around the world, my brother was doing some late evening car shopping. He had recently been in an accident that had totaled his car and was in the market for a new one.

He had handed the car salesman his phone so he could show the guy the pics of the damage to his car and the guy was looking through them when the words “UNSOLICITED DICK PIC!” popped up on the screen. My brother said the guy nearly dropped the phone trying to shove it back in his hands."

schnit123

"A couple of years ago met a guy from Tinder in a pub for our first date. Things were going well, we were having a laugh and flirting. After about an hour I took out my phone to show him a funny meme and up popped a notification from my new period tracking app saying “Today’s the day! You’re ovulating!”

I swiped it real quick and I dont think he got a good look at it but I was still worried he’d think i was some child-obsessed weirdo who timed my dates so random Tinder guys could impregnate me. I turned off ovulation notifications after that."

UnderTheHarvestMoon

"Not me, but a friend we’ll call Bob.

Bob, some friends, and I went out one night to watch a show in town. Afterwards, we decided to go get some drinks and decided to carpool.

Bob’s phone was dying so he asked if he could charge it on the way over with the car charger. While it was charging, it had apparently connected to the car’s speaker system and, without a warning, the car read a new text message out loud to all of our surprise:

“Hey baby, it’s been a long time since you came in my mouth. How about we hook up tonight so I can taste that juice again?”

Needlessly to say, he was mortified and the rest of us rolled with laughter on our way to the bar."

Staticlobo

"New job alert from ZipRecruiter while at work."

TimTheTooth

"Border patrol had my phone and my buddy sent me a text in which he jokingly said something like, “what makes you think they’ll let you in this time?” or something like that"

ImranRashid

“Potentional contact with a Corona-positive person”

GuyWithLightsaber

"My friend made this fake account on Twitter and followed me exactly at the time my teacher had taken my phone away. The notification read @analfister6969 has followed you."

zerinotseri

"I was showing my grandma some pictures. She chuckled a bit and quickly handed me back my phone. I looked at it and saw that my boyfriend (now husband) had texted me saying “I hate it when I’m pooping and my dick touches the water. Big dick problems.” We laughed about it, but my husband is still horrified by the thought of my grandma knowing about his “big dick problems.”"

prettyprincess93

"Chatting to a guy in a bar, handed him my phone so he could type his number in. At that moment a message pops up from my friend sat several tables away saying “shag him.”"

tshhh_xo

"I was chatting with a guy and it was going well, nothing sexual maybe mild flirting. So I didn’t care when I gave my buddy my phone for some reason. Then across the room he yells “YO THIS DUDE JUST ASKED IF YOU’D BE DOWN FOR ANAL!”

It was embarrassing."

RockClimber247

"Was showing my mum some cake ideas for my wife’s 30th that I was considering. My wife text me and my mum (for unknown reasons) got a full view of my wife’s poon with the caption “guess what you’re eating for dessert tonight?”.

I tried to grab my phone back, and my mum went back to browsing cakes without skipping a beat. As I was leaving my mum thought it would be funny to ask “Would you like 2nd dessert tonight, because I have a trifle in the fridge?”.

I nearly died of shame."

The_Invader_Kilz

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